Exciting News!!!!!

GUESS WHAT GUYS NO GO AHEAD GUESS DO YOU GIVE UP I'LL JUST TELL YOU

I WAS PICKED FOR PITCH WARS!!!!!!

And probably I shouldn't write this blog post in all caps, but on the inside I'm all AEKORJIRFANBJERHJFDAJRHEG

But on the outside I'm all SAHUIEFJOARJGAHRUEIGEARJEKGHEAEAJGKEALRE

So you can see that inside and outside I'm incomprehensibly excited.

ARIEHGJKALREG;EAHRJEKEAHREHAEKRE

Thanks to the awesome and very wise Alexandra Alessandri and Dannie Morin for taking me under their collective wings. We have a lot of work to do in the next two months! They've been relatively quiet so far, but it's the kind of quiet a lady lion does right before she pounces, only when they pounce on my manuscript, yeah it will get bloody and torn up, but instead of then rotting and stinking and turning to dust it will emerge from the tatters better and brighter. Like a Phoenix!

Huh. I should write a book about that.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA DO YOU SEE WHAT IT'S BEEN LIKE IN MY BRAIN/BODY ALL DAY TODAY SO MANY EXCLAMATORY TIMES!!!!!!

Anyway, on a more serious note, I'll be blogging about my experience, including the buckets of knowledge I'll gain, so tune in for more of these shenanigans.

May your Red Vines ever be soft!

I've been tagged! I know that comes as a surprise to all of you. Who plays tag anymore, and on the Internet? Dangerous. It's all fun and games until someone trips over their spell checker. Thanks to Gina, Jenna, and Amber for tagging me!

Since I was tagged three times, with 11 questions each, I've decided to pick five from each tagger to answer. So, here we go:

1. What is your favorite YouTube video? At the moment, this one: ^
2. What was the greatest live music experience you've ever had?  This will make me sound like a super lamey lamerson, but I've never actually been to a concert, except my own in high school. So, I'll have to say, high school choir solos were great. Oh, and once we sang the national anthem at Candlestick Park in California, which is where the Beatles did their last public performance. So, there you go.
3. What was your worst date ever? I was brought to the realization this summer, after a therapeutic discussion with a friend, that all of my worst dates have included frozen yogurt. The Frozen Yogurt Dates. Those are the worst ones.
4. If money is no object, what would your dream vacation be? I would love to go on an African safari, the kind with the open air jeeps and the lions chasing me and giraffes eating leaves out of my hand. My plan, after high school, was to go to Africa and become a safari guide but that fell through. On my way home, I'd stop in Greece, Italy, and New Zealand as well.
5.   Would you rather live in a crowded city or small town? Small town, but not too small. Although, my other plan after high school was to move to New York City and live in a tiny apartment, just me and a gray cat. This also fell through, in part because I'm allergic to cats.**
6. If you could choose the manner of your death- but not the timing- what would you choose? I would choose a skydiving mishap. Then, on my 95th birthday, I would bid my family and friends farewell, get in the plane, and jump to my destiny. And enjoy the ride down.
7. Redvines or Twizzlers? Pfff, Redvines. NEXT QUESTION, PLEASE.
8.   With your iPod/MP3 on shuffle, what's the first song that comes up? "Sleeping to Dream" by Jason Mraz. What can I say? I like angst.
9. You're the producer for turning any one book into a movie, which do you choose to do? Good grief, The Chaos Walking Trilogy by Patrick Ness, for sure. As producer, I do get to make sure the story isn't mangled, though, right? Because that would be a shame.
10.   Flowers or chocolate? Flowers. I love flowers.
11. Favorite book, movie, and TV show? Favorite books: The Two Princesses of Bamarre by Gail Carson Levine, I Capture The Castle by Dodie Smith, The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle by Avi. Favorite Movies: Stardust and Hairspray. Favorite TV show: Survivor. I will be on it someday, as soon as I get more buff and more crazy.
12. Would you rather have free Starbucks for five years or free itunes for life? I don't drink coffee, so iTunes wins hands down. I love me some music.
13. What inspires you more, music or visual (ie: photography, scenery, etc)? Music influences a lot of my creativity. But so does a long, hot shower...
14. Would you rather be able to talk to animals or to be able to speak and understand any language? I think it would be cool to talk to animals. I used to talk to dogs about my woes when I was in those awkward teenage years, so it would've come in handy.
15. Did you cry in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part two?  Was one of the times when Dumbledore asked Severus, "After all this time?" and Severus responded, "Always. "  And if not, are you sure you have a soul?  I don't let myself cry during movies unless I'm alone. If I feel the emotion rising, I chant, "It's not real. They're only acting. It's not real. They're only acting." I have vulnerability issues. As for the condition of my soul, well, let's talk about Fred Weasley and see how well my chanting works. 

Since I'm so late in the game, everyone else has been tagged, I think. So, I'm tagging...YOU! Pick one of the questions and answer it in the comments! (And if you haven't been tagged, consider this your tagsignation. [I don't know why I keep making up new words. I must be showing off for the new guys.])

**the real reason my plans fell through: I fell in love with my husband in high school and didn't want to leave him. Curse you, true love!!

My Eleventy-First Follower Giveaway Extraordinasticganza!!

First off, Bilbo would like to say a few words:

"I don't know half of you half as well as I should like..."

Now, now, Bilbo. Let's not get cheeky.

So! I've finally reached (and now sailed past) eleventy-one followers, which, seriously guys, makes me so happy. I've wanted to do a giveaway for a while and this feels like the perfect time.

I don't want to do anything complicated, so all you have to do is be a follower (or become a follower) and leave a comment to be entered. However! If you can tell me in your comment, in exactly 11 words, why you should or want to win, you will get another entry. Ditto if you Facebook, Tweet, or blog about the contest.


Prizes!


There are 11 prizes up for grabs:

1. A copy of my favorite book when I was 11 years old, THE TRUE CONFESSIONS OF CHARLOTTE DOYLE.
2. A copy of one of my favorite reads of 2011, I CAPTURE THE CASTLE.
3. A copy of Anne Lamott's BIRD BY BIRD, which is an excellent writing resource.
4. A package including some of my favorite writing treats and treasures, including this guy. (I tried to include a picture but it wouldn't let me.)
5. A first chapter crit.
6. An entire read through of your MS with feedback (and I'm a fast reader.)
7. A query crit from Christine Tyler. (I know, guys. I KNOW.)
8. An interview on my blog with 11 tailored-to-you questions.
   
9. A picture, based on your hook, drawn by my 6-year-old, Halle. (And she's got skills, mind you.)
10. A fanfiction, based on your hook, by my 8-year-old, Jenna. (Also awesome.)
11. The opportunity to pick my husband's brain about any medical or fighting questions you might have. He's a Physician Assistant and an all-sorts-of-violence (except real life) buff, so he knows what he's talking about.

Winners of the books, crits, and the package of treats will be awarded randomly. Other prizes MAY be awarded to my favorite 11 word comments. So entertain me, minions wonderful followers.

The contest will go until 11/11/11, which is three weeks from today.

So, to sum up:

Be a follower and leave a comment--1 point.
Leave an 11 word comment--1 point
Twitter, Facebook, or blog love-1 point each

Please tally up your point total in your comment (point tally not included in 11 words) and please, be honest. Remember, even if you can't see Bilbo, he might be watching you. And he doesn't like cheaters.

*shudder*

*side note for my sisters and other non-writer friends: Feel free to enter, too! If you win one of the writerly prizes, I'll be happy to negotiate alternatives. So...please enter?

**CONTEST CLOSED**

Why don't you run up an alley and holler fish?

I was at the grocery store today. Since it's just a small store, there isn't a conveyor belt to put your groceries on, just a small platform about the size of two gallons of milk and a bag of Red Vines (standing on end.) That means that you have to wait until the person in front of you has been rung up before you can drop your groceries on the little ledge.

The man behind me had his arms full; he must be from the same camp as me, the I-only-need-milk-crap-I-also-need-eggs-oh-and-also-mayo-and-I-almost-forgot-bananas-are-those-Ding-Dongs-on-sale-I-don't-want-to-go-back-up-front-and-get-a-basket-dangit-hurryuphurryuphurryup-checker-outer-lady. As soon as my last can of nacho cheese had been cleared, he unloaded his food pile. He did it so quickly that the checker looked up, surprised and asked, "Is this all together, then?"

I, with my extraordinary ability to make all normal situations awkward, turned red and said, "No." Blush, blush, blush. Perhaps sensing my (not really, but seeming) embarrassment, the checker said, "Oh, okay...unless you WANT to pay for his, too."

"Hahaha" went the checker lady.

"Hahaha" went the overburdened man without a concrete grocery list.

"Hahaha...nooooo," said I in a weirdly sing-song, strangled voice that suggested I thought they really would make me pay for his groceries.

Then I stood there, marinating in the awkward silence I'd single-handedly created, wishing I could be more witty on my feet. Only as I walked away did I think of the comeback: "Only if he pays next time."

HAHAHA! ZING!

Okay, still not perfect, but better.

Anyway, it got me thinking about realistic dialogue in stories, and how much it bugs me when people get this witty banter back and forth and back and forth and backandforth, because yo, I never think of the right thing to say in front of people, much less the guy I'm crushing on. (My actual response one time when the cute guy in my class spoke directly to me: "Mehhrgplbbb." Followed by raucous laughter from the whole class.) Why can't we read more of that??

I'm pretty sure a whole book of two people hemming and hawing would get boring fast. And isn't it kind of therapeutic to get some snappy comebacks in when two of your characters are arguing?

There's an old Don Knotts movie called "The Ghost and Mister Chicken" that I love. Don Knotts plays, of course, a bumbling sort of guy and one of the things about him is that he's very tongue-tied when he gets nervous, which is pretty much the whole show. At one point, the mean guy yells, "Who do you think you are?" and he responds with, "Drop dead, that's who!" and then he storms off. I die laughing every time. He is also the mastermind behind, "Why don't you run up an alley and holler fish?"

I love that his character isn't putting the bad guys in their place. He's just a normal guy, trying to be brave but getting it all mixed up anyway. Making normal stuff awkward. My man. *fistbump*

So, the question is, how do you make sure your dialogue sounds realistic, without getting too ho-hum? Do you like it when characters are all quick and witty and snappy all the time?